Tasha, Get Up!

Have you ever taken a hit so hard that it knocked the very breath out of you? I thought 2018 tried to kill me, but 2019 was waiting for me at the door… lol, literally. I made the statement that in 2019 I was coming for my comfort zone and stepping out this year. Well, 2019 was like, ok that’s cute, but let me make you even more uncomfortable. Let me tell you that thing hit me so hard! It made me grab my chest. It hit me so hard that it even hurt to breathe. I remember one Sunday, I was preparing for church. I was walking to my closet to grab my clothes and my legs started to buckle and it was hard for me to catch my breath. It took all my strength to even get up that morning. So, I sat at the edge of my bed, after catching my breath, I kept telling myself Tasha get up, you got this. Tasha get up you can do this. Tasha get up. I repeated that to myself over and over. Until I got the strength to get back up and finish getting ready.

I thought moving up here and leaving everything I had known behind was scary, but it didn’t compare to this! Uncertainty and fear has gripped me so tight that I question everything now. The fears were speaking even louder than it did when I took the chance on moving.  My inadequacies are speaking louder. Feeling like a failure is speaking louder. The “I told you so’s” are speaking louder. The negative things that people said before I moved up here and even afterwards are louder now. The negative ways I see myself are speaking louder. The crazy part of it is, that in the midst of this, God sends me people who feels the same as I do, for me to minister to them in those same areas. I began to speak life into them, encouraging them and building up their confidence. I’m like, “God, Really? Why did You send them to me? Who am I to tell them anything? I’m not qualified to do such a thing.” Everything in me wants to shut down, hide, and isolate myself. Even in that something in me won’t allow me to. It keeps telling me, “Tasha Get Up! You got this! You can’t quit!” 

While at church today God began to have a conversation with me;

God: “Tasha Get Up, Tasha Get Up”

Me: “God I don’t want to get up this hurts!”

God: “Tasha Get Up”

Me: “Why?”

God: “Because I need you too, Tasha Get Up”

Me: “No one needs me”

God: “Tasha Get Up”

Me: “I’m tired of getting up only to be knocked down further than what I was when I made the last decision to get up and broken even more than I was. God I’m tired!”

God: “Tasha Get Up”

Me. “For what? God I’m tired of being strong. I want to be weak and vulnerable.”

God: “Tasha Get Up, I need you to Get Up!” 

Me: “Ok God” (with an attitude and tears streaming down my face)

I was convicted last Friday because the prior week I was supposed to reach out and check on a few people and I didn’t. On my way to work my heart was so heavy. I started crying, but the tears wasn’t for me they were for someone else. I felt their pain. 

God told me, “this is why I need you to get up. People are waiting on you. People are waiting for the updated version of you. I know it seems that everywhere you turn it seems to be getting worse instead of better, but Trust Me. There’s so much more to you. You haven’t even scratched the surface of the woman that you will be.” I’m like she has to be a beast because after all that I’ve endured! I have to believe it’s something beautiful on the other side of this. I have to become her.

 Ephesians 2:10 says, “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”

You are not a mistake. You are special and we got work to do. God needs the “Whole” you and “Healed” you. Be intentional this year. Have the hard conversations with yourself. Do the work and allow God to do the work within you. 

GET UP! IT IS TIME! 

16 thoughts on “Tasha, Get Up!

  1. I dont know if I need to drive all the way to Ga…. just to slap you, SHOUT, CRY, OR JUST SIT HERE IN AWEEEEEE….. I SUPPOSE YOU UP UP NOW…. HUH🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂….. Glad you got⬆️. Love you Sis😍😍😍😍

    Liked by 1 person

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